Here’s a question for a Monday morning ? When did you last say “I can’t ” do something ?Now think about what that really meant.

-Did you mean that you did not have the skills/time/resources to allow you to ?

or

- Did you mean that you did have what it took but didn’t want to?

or

- Did you mean that weighing up the options you had chosen not to?

There is quite a difference when you think about it.

Like when I went to my local car service centre to try to get a part for my car which had been ordered from another branch – which had not turned up. The guy told me he couldn’t help me because he had had nothing to do with that order. Can’t/don’t want to/chosen not to?

Or when a client says that they can’t  take on a course of study which might improve their promotion chances. Can’t /don’t want to/chosen not to?

Or when you are approached by a charity to make a donation. Can’t/don’t want to/have chosen not to?

There is quite a difference between the 3 different responses. It’s important – and in view – very helpful to know which one you really mean.