Mar
21
Asking for help
Filed Under Mentoring, business, World of Work
I think Steve Roesler’s post at All Things Workplace on getting things done by asking for help is great! It got me thinking about asking for help generally.
Like Steve I think there is often a feeling that to ask for help shows “weakness” and this stops people from doing so. Which is a pity.
Steve writes about enhancing employee engagement by asking for help and that it adds “meaning to the task”.
Engagement at work really should not be optional - if you can’t or won’t engage with your job then what is the point of being there? I know - the choice to leave will possibly be a hard one but might not be so hard weighed up against the impact on you and your organisation of being disengaged.
In life in general though we have a choice. For example I am often asked to help by making financial donations to charities. I choose the ones I support. I can’t help them all. However, I have been asked to help by doing a small thing (to me) that can make a big difference (to others). I meet many representatives from small voluntary and charitable organisations they often say that a little help in a variety of ways would sometimes make as much if not more of an impact to how they operate than a financial donation.
And, as I think back to the early stages of setting out as an independent consultant I spent time with others in the same boat. Quite frankly we were all looking for help at that stage! Some found a mentor, others chose to network and gain experience that way, others looked for associates and/or partnerships. The business development leaders who were working with us urged us not to stand alone and to open up to help as this was more likely to lead to success.
Can I lend a couple of words of advice here though.
1 If you are asking for help - be clear on what you are asking for. ( Look at Steve’s suggestion for how the manager asks for help).
2 If you think someone needs your help - be considerate on how you put your offer. “I have some experience in that field that I would be happy to share with you ” might be better received than ” You’re obviously struggling - you need my help”.
And a final point - and this applies in all situations ( managers and leaders take note) - when you get the help you asked for remember to say “Thank You”!
You have a lovely addition to Steve’s post, Jackie. I’m glad you bring out the idea that someone can step in and act as a mentor because some people have another problem when asking for help, that is, they are shy. And that takes building some extra skills yet. Some of these problems are truly many-faceted.
Hi Robyn
I know of cases of mentoring relationships which have been really valuable - to both the mentor and the mentee. And yes I agree that plucking up the courage to ask for help can be a challenge in itself for some people.
Thanks for this
Jackie
Jackie,
“Thank you.”